Friday, 14 November 2008

Joke corner

so last night I was thinking I should actually start writing down some of the jokes I come up with, because well I am a reasonably funny guy :o who knows I might even do stand up? (haha me doing stand up is funny in itself)
So here is my space for hilarity:

Jesus touched me, I sued, he settled out of court for an undisclosed sum

A man goes upto a woman in a bar and says "hey baby, you and me baby ain't nothing but mammels so lets do it like they do on the discovery channel"
The woman looked at him for a minute and replied "sure thing!"
They then preceeded to a park where they took down and killed a Gazell by hand and consumed the raw flesh of it

So in this time of economic hardship I know what you're thinking, will the price of tomato ketchup affect my daily life? well the simple answer is no. Its the mustard eaters that have to worry, not because of the prices, its the Collmans bull, he's out to get you! You may wonder why but if you were a bull and you lived soley on mustard, a food product that you must admit does not appear naturally in the bulls food chain you'd be pretty pissed off too

18 comments:











  1. i am very grateful sharing this great testimonies with you, The best thing that has ever happened in my life is how i win the lottery. I am a woman who believe that one day i will win the lottery.finally my dreams came through when i email PRIEST WISDOM  . and tell him i need the lottery numbers. i have come a long way spending money on ticket just to make sure i win. But i never know that winning was so easy until the day i meant the spell caster online which so many people has talked about that he is very great in casting lottery spell, so i decide to give it a try.I contacted this man and he did a spell and he gave me the winning lottery numbers. But believe me when the draws were out i was among winners. i win $90.000  Dollar. PRIEST WISDOM truly you are the best, with these man you can will millions of money through lottery. i am so very happy to meet these man, i will forever be grateful Email him on Supernaturalspell1@gmail.com or WHATSAPP  or Call Via +2348124644470 




















    i am very grateful sharing this great testimonies with you, The best thing that has ever happened in my life is how i win the lottery. I am a woman who believe that one day i will win the lottery.finally my dreams came through when i email PRIEST WISDOM  . and tell him i need the lottery numbers. i have come a long way spending money on ticket just to make sure i win. But i never know that winning was so easy until the day i meant the spell caster online which so many people has talked about that he is very great in casting lottery spell, so i decide to give it a try.I contacted this man and he did a spell and he gave me the winning lottery numbers. But believe me when the draws were out i was among winners. i win $90.000  Dollar. PRIEST WISDOM truly you are the best, with these man you can will millions of money through lottery. i am so very happy to meet these man, i will forever be grateful Email him on Supernaturalspell1@gmail.com or WHATSAPP  or Call Via +2348124644470 







    ReplyDelete
  2. i am very grateful sharing this great testimonies with you, The best thing that has ever happened in my life is how i win the lottery. I am a woman who believe that one day i will win the lottery.finally my dreams came through when i email Dr Alli . and tell him i need the lottery numbers. i have come a long way spending money on ticket just to make sure i win. But i never know that winning was so easy until the day i meant the spell caster online which so many people has talked about that he is very great in casting lottery spell, so i decide to give it a try.I contacted this man and he did a spell and he gave me the winning lottery numbers. But believe me when the draws were out i was among winners. i win 1.900.000 million Dollar. Dr. Alli truly you are the best, with these man you can will millions of money through lottery. i am so very happy to meet these man, i will forever be grateful to you. Email him for your own winning lottery numbers [ Allispellhelp1@gmail.com ]. OR Whatsapp or Call Via +2348100772528.  

    ReplyDelete
  3. Straight away after Dr.Alli cast the Lottery spell for me, I felt enveloped by the control of the lotto spell. This spell changes my life into riches. I am now out of debts and experiencing the most amazing good luck with lotto after I won a huge amount of money. I have more luck now than I ever had in my life. i won 1.900.000 million pounds. Your Lotto spell made wonders, I can't believe it. Thank you so much, sir for dedicating your time to cast the Lotto spell for me.”I am eternally grateful for the lotto spell Dr.Alli did for me. You can email him for you own lottery number.email him on

    Allispellhelp1@gmail.com
    WhatsApp +2348100772528

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yes it is true that Dr Isikolo is the best to restore broken homes and relationships.
    My name is Jojo Ivan and i was a client for DR ISIKOLO and i must tell you that he is a real spell caster. When i contacted this spell caster my boyfriend had left me for 2 years and i have always wanted him back to me. I met DR ISIKOLO to help me about a month ago and i have reconnected with my boyfriend. When my ex boyfriend left me it was turmoil for me. This became a disaster for me that i had a physiological trauma and my family were very worried about my health. After 2 years, I met DR ISIKOLO through a testimony also and he told me to calm myself that no matter what the problem is, he is well and ready to help anyone who comes to him. Just in 2 days, my ex called me and wanted to meet. I agreed and made preparations to meet him and he told me how he had felt guilty for what he did and he wanted me back. I praised DR ISIKOLO for his marvelous handiwork and i will recommend him to anyone who needs a spell caster. Contact him to help you and fast at his email isikolosolutionhome@gmail.com You can also Whatsapp him on +2348133261196

    ReplyDelete

  5. I am Kimberly Eric From US...I had to write back and say what an amazing experience I had with Dr NANA powerful lottery spell. My Heart is fill with joy and happiness after Dr NANA cast the Lottery spell for me, And i won $4,369,877. His spell change my life into riches, I'm now out of debts and experiencing the most amazing good luck with lottery after i won a huge amount of money. My life has really change for good. I won (Four million three hundred and sixty nine thousand Eight hundred and seventy seven thousand dollars)Your Lottery spell is so real and pure. Thank you very much Dr. NANA for the lottery spell that change my life”I am totally grateful for the lottery spell Dr NANA did for me. You can email him for you own lottery number,because these is the only secret to win lottery.
    Email him: Nanakwakuspiritualist@gmail.com 
    Whats App number +233 57 679 3653

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hello i am here to spread this good news to the entire world on how i got my ex love back.I was going crazy when my love left me for another girl last month,But when i meet a friend that introduce me to DR IROSI the great messenger to the oracle that he serve,I narrated my problem to DR IROSI about how my ex love left me and also how i needed to get a job in a very big company.He only said to me that i have come to the right place were i will be getting my heart desire without any side effect.He told me what i need to do,After it was been done,In the next 2 days,My love called me on the phone and was saying sorry for living me before now and also in the next one week after my love called me to be pleading for forgiveness,I was called for interview in my desired company were i needed to work as the managing director..I am so happy and overwhelmed that i have to tell this to the entire world to contact DR IROSI at the following email address DRIROSISOLUTIONCENTER@GMAIL.COM and get all your problem solve..No problem is too big for him to solve..Contact him direct on DRIROSISOLUTIONCENTER@GMAIL.COM or call his mobile number or add him up on whatsapp via (+2348118829771). and get your problems solve like me.    

    ReplyDelete

  7. I never believed in Spells or Magics until I met this special spell caster called DR BEN.. The man i wanted to marry left me 3 months to our wedding ceremony and my life was upside down.he was with me for 4 years and i really love him so much..he left me for another woman with no reasons..when i called him, he never picked up my calls and he don't want to see me around him...so,when i told the man what happened. he helped me to do some readings,and after the readings he made me to realize that the other woman has done some spells over my Husband and that is the reason why he left me..he told me he will help me to cast a spell to bring him back. At first i was skeptical but i just gave it a try...In 4 days, My Husband called me himself and came to me apologizing..I cant believe he can ever come back to me again but now i am happy he's back and we are married now and we live as a happy family..Am posting this to the forum if anyone needs the help of this man.Can contact him through Whatsapp +2348151642717..

    ReplyDelete
  8. My Name is Nadira from United States of America , I do hope my post gets read and hopefully helps somebody along the line. i will never forget the help the Dr,Tony temple render to me in my marital life. i have been married for 4 years now and my husband and i love each other very dearly. after 3 years of our marriage my husband suddenly change he was having an affair with a lady outside, i notice it then i was praying for divine intervention the thing became more serious i told my pastor about it we prayed but nothing happen. my husband just came home one day he pick up his things and left me and the kids to his mistress outside at that time i was confuse not knowing what to do again because i have lost my husband and my marriage too. i was just checking my mails in the office when i saw someone sharing her testimony on how Dr,Tony help her out with her marital problems so i contacted the email of Dr,Tony i told him my problem and i was told to be calm that i have come to the right place that i should fill some information concerning my self i did after 30 minus he called me again congratulating me that my problems will be solve within 48 hours. he told me what went wrong with my husband and how it happen.that they will restored my marriage but i will make a free donation to his spell home anything my heart told me. to my greatest surprise my husband came to my office begging me on his knees that i should find a place in my heart to forgive him i quickly ask him up that i have forgiven him.friends your case is not too hard why don't you give Dr,Tony a try he work surprises because i know they will also bring back your husband. contact him via tonylovespell@aol.com OR his whatsapp mobile number +1(903) 847 0267

    ReplyDelete
  9. I NEED A LOVE SPELL THAT WILL MANIFEST WITHIN 24 HOURS CONTACT (DR JUMBA ) HE HIS THE BEST LOVE SPELL CASTER WHO HELPED ME RESTORE HAPPINESS BACK TO MY RELATIONSHIP

    Hello everyone i want to testify of the great and powerful spell caster named Dr Jumba who brought back my ex who left me and got engaged to another girl,We where happy together when all of a sudden he just change he used to call me every morning and and night before going to bed but all that stopped when i call him he yell at me and told me he didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore i was so sad and confused i didn't know what to do then i went online to search on how to get back my ex then i found an article where someone was talking about how the great and powerful Dr Jumba helped her and she left his email address i took it and contacted him i told him my problem he only smiled and told me to relax everything will be OK i did everything he asked me to do and he assured me that after 24hrs he will be back,To my greatest surprise the next morning it was my boyfriend he came back knelling and begging for me to accept him back now we are so happy together he can also help you contact him at wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com or wiccalovespelltools@yahoo.com text or call him +19085174108

    website : http://wiccalovespelltools.website2.me/
    BLOG : https://manifest277.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  10. HOW I WON £4,369,877.00 WITH DR ALLI LOTTERY MAGIC SPELL

    I am  SARA KIM From the UK...I had to write back and say what an amazing experience I had with Dr Alli's powerful lottery spell. My Heart is fill with joy and happiness after Dr Alli cast the Lottery spell for me, And i won £4,369,877.00 His spell change my life into riches, I'm now out of debts and experiencing the most amazing good luck with lottery after i won a huge amount of money. My life has really changed for good. I won (Four million three hundred and sixty nine thousand Eight hundred and seventy seven thousand pounds)Your Lottery spell is so real and pure. Thank you very much Dr. Alli for the lottery spell that changed my life”I am totally grateful for the lottery spell Dr Alli did for me. You can email him for your own lottery number,because these is the only secret to winning the lottery.
    Email him:  Allispellhelp1@gmail.com Whats App him: +2348100772528

    ReplyDelete
  11. My ex-husband and I had always managed to stay friendly after our divorce in February 2017. But I always wanted to get back together with him, All it took was a visit to this spell casters website last December, because my dream was to start a new year with my husband, and live happily with him.. This spell caster requested a specific love spell for me and my husband, and I accepted it. And this powerful spell caster began to work his magic. And 48 hours after this spell caster worked for me, my husband called me back for us to be together again, and he was remorseful for all his wrong deeds. My spell is working because guess what: My “husband” is back and we are making preparations on how to go to court and withdraw our divorce papers ASAP. This is nothing short of a miracle. Thank you Dr Emu for your powerful spells. Words are not enough. here is his Email: emutemple@gmail.com or call/text him on his WhatsApp +2347012841542    

    ReplyDelete
  12. Five weeks ago my boyfriend broke up with me. It all started when i went to summer camp i was trying to contact him but it was not going through. So when I came back from camp I saw him with a young lady kissing in his bed room, I was frustrated and it gave me a sleepless night. I thought he will come back to apologies but he didn't come for almost three week i was really hurt but i thank Dr.Azuka for all he did i met Dr.Azuka during my search at the internet i decided to contact him on his email dr.azukasolutionhome@gmail.com he brought my boyfriend back to me just within 48 hours i am really happy. What’s app contact : +44 7520 636249‬

    ReplyDelete

  13. I am FRED and i want quickly recommend DR NCUBE for a Job well done by
    curing me from the genital herpes disease that have be giving me sleepless night. if you want to contact him, Simply do that via email drncube03@gmail.com or
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    he also have #herbs for
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    ReplyDelete
  14. How To Get Your Ex Lover/Partner/Boyfriend/Girlfriend/Wife Or Husband Back

    I was married for 16 years to a loving mother and wife. We had 2 children together who are now 11 & 13. I reconnected with an old girlfriend from college on Facebook and we began an affair and I left my wife. The woman I had an affair with is a wonderful woman and I love her too and our kids had begun accepting the situation and my wife has kind of moved on, but not in love with the man she is seeing. I thought I fell out of love with my wife and I felt terrible about what I did to her - she is a good woman and I don't know what came over me. I decided to try and get her back and I was recommended to Lord Zakuza for help to get reunited with my wife and within 48 hours after I made contact with Lord Zakuza my wife decided to work things out with me and now we are back together with our children living as one happy family. I really don't know the words to use in appreciation of what Lord Zakuza did for me but I will say thank you sir for reuniting I and my family back. For those in trying times with their marriages or relationship can communicate with LORD ZAKUZA through the below information's.

    Website via: lordzakuzaspells.com
    WhatsApp/call/text: +1 740 573 9483
    Email: Lordzakuza7 @gmail. com

    ReplyDelete
  15. It is a very hard situation when playing the lottery and never won, or keep winning low fund not up to 100 bucks, i have been a victim of such a tough life, the biggest fund i have ever won was 100 bucks, and i have been playing lottery for almost 12 years now, things suddenly change the moment i came across a secret online, a testimony of a spell caster called DR EMU, who help people in any type of lottery numbers, i was not easily convinced, but i decided to give try, now i am a proud lottery winner with the help of DR EMU, i won $1,000.0000.00 and i am making this known to every one out there who have been trying all day to win the lottery, believe me this is the only way to win the lottery.

    Contact him via email Emutemple@gmail.com
    What's app +2347012841542
    Https://emutemple.wordpress.com/

    ReplyDelete
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  17. I'm Thomas Yi from the United States. I started playing lottery games 3 years ago and I have never won big. I went online to seek help on how I can win big in my lottery games and I saw some nice reviews about Dr Amber who has made different people huge winners in their lottery games with his prayers. I gave it a try and I contacted Dr Amber who told me how and what to do before I can become a big lotto winner and I accepted. He made special prayers for me at his temple and gave me the required numbers to play the lotto game and when I played it, I won a massive $235.4 million POWERBALL jackpot. I was so happy and I chose to receive my winnings in a one-time, lump-sum payment of $160,038,447.27 at Florida Lottery Headquarters in Tallahassee and the balance was given to the store that I bought & played the game from. I would love other people to seek help from him and he can be contacted through WhatsApp/call/text via this number +1 (406) 646-2222 or email on: amberlottotemple@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  18. Happy to have my lover back after 3 months of breakup,

    How To Get Your Lover Back & Avoid breakup,

    Help That Really Work Fast,

    Contact him for Relationship/marital problem,

    Thanks to Robinsonbuckler11 @ gmail (.) com,,

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